Best Wedding Jokes and Quotes

Anonymous
Every man needs a wife because things sometimes go wrong that you can't blame on the government!

Ambrose Bierce
Love: a temporary insanity, curable by marriage.

H. L. Mencken, Prejudices, 1919
To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia -- to mistake an ordinary young man for a Greek god or an ordinary young woman for a goddess.

Marriages are made in heaven. But, again, so are thunder, lightning, tornados and hail.

Punch magazine,1845
Advice to person about to marry - Don't. -

Dr. Johnson
Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has no pleasure

Nick Faldo
We were happily married for eight months. Unfortunately, we were married for four and a half years.

John Barrymore
Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.

Herbert V Prochnow and Herbert V Prochnow Jnr
The brain is a wonderful thing. It never stops functioning from the time you're born until the moment you stand up to make a speech. -

Some of these from Presentation Helper