Doctors' Comments On Patient Charts

  • "Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year."

  • "On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely."

  • "The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993."

  • "Discharge status: Alive but without permission."

  • "Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful."

  • "The patient refused an autopsy."

  • "The patient has no past history of suicides."

  • "Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital."

  • "Patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days."
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